True Names
by Yaoi flame
Summary: What if L and Light meet under different circumstances...? I decided to add another chapter. DISCONTINUED
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own anything that has to do with the Death Note, only this story. Although I'd like to have DN, just don't know what I would do with it.

AN: I took the liberty to change the plot and shorten it. This is happening after the manga chapter when L shows his appearance to Raito's father.

This story contains several parts. To be clear, _**parts**_, not chapters.

It's kinda pointless, but I'd appreciate if you review. :)

I hope you'll enjoy it and please make sure to review.

**Prologue**

Despite the fact that he befriended with the head of Kira investigation, Yagami Suichirou, L knew that Kira was someone from the police, and it could easily be Yagami himself.

For days he was wondering what to do, since Yagami was the least dubious among the cops in Kira case. But, from experience, he knew that the one to be the least dubious is, actually, the one to be guilty.

Sitting in the darkness of his hotel room, barefoot, in front of his computer, he was checking on Yagami's family. An unclear idea was born in his head. He intended to befriend with Yagamis, in order to prove his theory. Besides, it would be fun, since nobody knew his true name. If someone from Yagami family was Kira, he or she couldn't kill him.

Of course, he couldn't get close to Suichirou as much as he wanted, since he had set the rule not to mix professional and personal life, in order to maintain safety.

But now, that rule was hindrance. Therefore, he needed to befriend with another family member. If he befriended with wife, Suichirou would think that it was adultery, so it was out of the question.

To befriend with daughter, they could consider him a pedophile. So the last to remain was son.

Yagami Raito.

And L knew that the boy was a perfect choice. Looking at the boy's files, he saw that Raito was 18 years old, so not a kid, but not yet a man. Perfect. He was very smart, as well, according to the results from school. If only L knew how _much_ Raito was smart.

Maybe it was time to put the shoes on and see the daylight for the first time in a long period of time. It was time to crawl out of comfy beds and armchairs.

First thing to do was to find out where Raito went for lunch during the school break.

---

---

---

**Part 1: Look**

There was too much confidence in those pretty eyes. L couldn't help but notice they were pretty.

He was arrogant.

He was a challenge.

L loved challenges.

It started with the idea that if those eyes look at him with that well-known trust once more, he'll fall for Raito. At first, it seemed silly, and he was laughing at himself.

He was odd enough for society. He really didn't need to add a title of a faggot to that.

But still…The younger Yagami's eyes were the first to catch his attention. They were so deep, intense and they were hiding a secret.

'No way!' L thought, but never put that possibility aside. He just didn't want to rush with conclusions. 'No way he's Kira!'

It would really be the great irony--all of them were too close to Kira, but they didn't even know.

It would really be too much.

But the detective in him was always taking Raito as one of the suspects.

"Raito, is there anything wrong with my look?" he asked one day, when he thought that they had broken the ice and that Raito was considering him a friend.

"What do you mean?" asked the brunet absentmindedly. He was reading a computer magazine, lying on the bed in his room.

L was sitting next to him, barefoot, of course.

"It's just that every girl I've been with would run away after a month of being with me. They usually say that there is something wrong when they look at my eyes. And generally, they find me odd."

Raito smiled, shifting his look from the magazine to his new best friend. He chuckled.

"But still, they put up with you for a month." he tried to cheer him up.

"That's because they say that…" L trailed off. Too much information, and as a detective, he couldn't let them leak.

"They say what?"

"Doesn't matter…" L hesitated, sucking on his thumb.

Silence.

"There is nothing wrong with your eyes, Ryuuzaki", Raito said, "But it looks that you don't sleep much. You have bags under your eyes, but they're not ugly."

Ryuuzaki…

The fake name. He was dishonest with his only friend. But that was sacrifice he had to take in order to catch Kira.

"What are they, then?"

"Mysterious, I'd say. Like you're some kind of a detective." Raito turned back to his magazine.

'You'll never know that you were right' thought L with certain sadness.

Raito looked at him again.

"When I think better, I know why you don't sleep much and why you keep your girlfriends for at least a month."

"Why?" L looked at him.

Raito gave him a wild smile and winked. He said nothing.

But L could see in his eyes. There was something suggestive in the way Raito was looking at him…Or it was just an illusion.

---

**Part 2: Touch**

It didn't take him long to realize that the universe had decided to play with him. He was now even odder than before. He was queer.

It didn't take him much to realize, for when Raito and he were taking a walk that afternoon, their hands brushed by accident and L could feel shivers down his spine.

He decided to keep his hands in pockets for safety.

But when the wind blew, the raven hair fell in his eyes.

Raito's gentle hand brushed his forehead in order to remove his wild hair.

"Your hair is wild." he stated. For the first time, the great detective remained wordless. He wasn't prepared for situations like that one.

'But that's only my illusion…He's been talking about girls all this day…and the previous one…and the one before that…Besides, I must concentrate on my investigation'

Touch doesn't always have to be gentle.

The touch he had experienced after he had met Raito on purpose, Mr. Yagami had touched his face.

The mark of the touch had remained for days, but Raito had never asked about it.

---

**Part 3: Brush of the Breeze**

It was the matter of a moment. And it caressed him like a breeze.

One day they were sitting in Raito's room, doing nothing.

It was strange how Kira's murders stopped happening all of a sudden. But L had a slight clue why.

"They say that I'm good listener." L said all of a sudden. "So, when they start talking, there's no end. And I just listen. Until they have nothing to say and leave me."

That was sad and Raito made a grimace.

"Oh."

'I don't sleep because I'm odd... And because I'm a detective. I need to solve this case.'

"You thought it was something else?"

"Well" Raito chuckled, gluing his eyes to the ceiling. They were glassy and dreamy. The weather outside was warm and beautiful. He never stopped chuckling, as he fell back on his pillows, "I thought that they were staying with you because you are a …well…good fucker."

L looked at him in confusion and embarrassment.

"Amusing analogy, Raito. But no."

"You sound like a picture of ideal boyfriend. All you need is to listen." Raito looked at him, "I'm your opposite. I just fuck. I never give into emotions."

"But what's the point of a mere touch, let alone everything else, if there is no purpose?"

"What purpose?"

"The feeling of belonging, emotions…love?" L shrugged.

"I never thought of that" Raito admitted, "For example, if I even kiss you, it wouldn't make a difference. It's just a mere touch and nothing more."

To prove his theory, Raito stood up from his comfy pillows, brushing their noses.

Before he did anything, he made an eye contact.

He could feel L's obvious nervousness.

And then the breeze touched them. It was made by gentle brushing of lips.

Raito brushed his lips against L's, asking to access deeper.

Which was approved.

And just like that, Raito's theory was crushed.

---

**Part 4: Thunder in Our Hearts**

A moan escaped his lips. And all the Yagamis knew what was going on.

Raito covered his mouth, but the fact was that he loved L's screams and moans.

Their erratic breathing was echoing in the room.

L was looking so vulnerable, having a strong climax.

Raito smiled in self-satisfaction. He made him come for the third time that evening.

All his family members downstairs were disapproving their relationship. But Raito was too much in love to care.

His father almost died because of that.

Terrible arguments, fights, even. But he remained with L.

And all what L could say to the police associates was: "Fuck Kira case, I'm in love."

For the murders had ceased several months ago, death note long forgotten.

Ryuuku was bored and fed up with voyeurism.

If only he could choke himself with an apple. That would be nice…Or to write his own name in the death note. But all of that was impossible.

"Ryuuzaki…" his whisper was half-moan.

He collapsed next to his boyfriend.

He could hear their wild heartbeats. They sounded like thunders in a distance.

---

**Part 5: Our Memories**

Ryuuzaki: Loose attitude, messy raven hair, bored face expression, so cute, cute, cute…Like he's sleepy all the time. Barefoot, sugar lover…

That's how Raito remembered him after several months of being together. If the circumstances were different and if he knew that Ryuuzaki was actually L, a detective that found him dubious, he would think he was asshole and would hate him to death.

It's been four years now.

They were planning a family.

They would create a new photo album.

The old one was containing so many pictures of them, happy most of the time.

For they were compatible.

Opposites attract.

"I wish to remember you the way you are now." whispered Raito while watching his lover in a blissful state of sleep.

---

**Part 6: The Discovery**

"A stupid L! That's what you've been all the time!" Raito screamed, "Observing me!" the whole world was crashing before him.

"And you're Kira." L stated peacefully." But I don't make a fuss."

Raito was restlessly pacing through his room.

"I wish I could kill you…If only I had that death note…But my desk burned when you tried to open that drawer…"

"You don't know my true name."

"I've been with you for so many years, believing I was wrong, that love really existed. But all of those were lies…You…liar…!" he collapsed on the bed. "Don't wanna see you anymore…"

---

**Epilogue**

"But Raito, you should know one thing….One day love will save the world…not death." L said and left Raito's room.

_Love will save the world…_

"I love you, Kira." Raito could hear as L was leaving. He turned to look at the closed door.

_I won't turn you in, Raito_

He flipped the phone open.

Two fingers of five were holding the other phone.

"Come back here, L…"

---

Owari


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Since you guys liked the story, I decided to continue it and add another chapter. :)**

**Each chapter will have its prologue, epilogue, and several parts.**

**Each chapter will be independent, so I can end the story anytime I want. **

**I'm still taking liberty to change the plot.**

**Many of you told me that you doubted L would give up on the case that easily. And I guess you were right. But since the death note was destroyed when L opened the drawer, there is no evidence of Raito (Light)'s crime, therefore the crime itself doesn't exist.**

**I hope you'll enjoy this, just like you enjoyed previous chapter. :)**

**Please make sure to review afterwards! It means a lot, as you all know. **

**---**

**Prologue**

That child-like face L was having when he was sleeping was something that amused Raito the most. Who would have thought that behind that innocent face was the world's greatest detective?

They've been having a terrible night, full of endless talking and explaining. In the end, Raito had noticed, Ryuuku had disappeared and all of a sudden, he hadn't known why L and he were arguing about.

He was looking at his lover, who was sleeping peacefully. He loved that face.

But he knew that something strange had happened to him and he was certain that L knew what.

L knew everything.

---

**Part 1: Questions**

He decided not to ask a thing for a while. He wanted to maintain harmony. He and L were functioning as one, always interrupting each other while talking, having good and smart conversations, and having the same points of view.

Raito was satisfied, because he had someone special in every way. He had someone eccentric, who hated socks, but adored sweets; someone who was so smart and eloquent; someone who was interesting and different.

But he was wondering when his family would accept their relationship.

He knew that his father was feeling something more than hatred towards L, as if they knew each other from earlier. He could not connect it to the fact that L was _the_ detective, working together with his father on Kira case. No, he could not, for he's lost his memory of that particular period.

For him, L was still Ryuuzaki.

Somehow, L was aware of the fact that Raito had lost his memory and didn't know he'd been Kira.

He fell for someone who was his enemy once, for the first time in his life.

Love knew no limits.

L was happy because, they could have started all over again. He would forget about that incident, since Raito had already forgotten.

---

"Why, Raito?" asked his mother, "You know for the fact that your father considers you a disgrace for this family."

Raito lowered his head. His father had thrown him out of their home as soon as he discovered that Raito hadn't stopped dating L. He hadn't spoken to his father ever since. In fact, his father was the one who didn't want to talk to him.

It was all emptiness in his heart, once he had been the family's greatest pride, only to fall that low and become a disgrace.

"Do you love him or it is just a caprice of yours?" his mother sat beside him on the couch. He couldn't look at her, at those disappointed eyes. She was in pain.

"I really don't understand that kind of relationship. Why a man? Why not a woman?"

He found himself unable to breathe. He was restless.

He sighed.

"If I didn't love him, I wouldn't be with him for so long." he barely whispered. He paused before he spoke again. "Am I a disgrace for _you_, mother?" he asked.

"My true name is Disgrace, not Pride, anymore? Not Hope?" he looked at her with a broken look.

She stopped looking at him.

"Your father will be here any minute. It'd be better if you leave now." she said, wiping the tears from her eyes.

Raito stood up, deeply hurt. He couldn't look at her anymore. He couldn't look at their family pictures, furniture. He couldn't look in the direction of his former bedroom.

The memories of what he had been once and what he was now-such a contradictory. It made the wound in his soul.

---

**Part 2: Amane Misa **

One idea just couldn't disappear from her mind. The bimbo wanted to revive Kira in order to find the first one, who stopped punishing criminals long time ago.

One special shinigami, a female named Remu, dropped her death note in order to make her wish. A mother inside her loved the girl to the points of insanity.

But poor model, Amane Misa, couldn't find the first Kira. She was deeply grateful and in love with the guy she had never met.

With a little help from Remu's friend, Ryuuku, her dreams became true.

What she saw made her even happier. The first Kira was handsome, tall young man. He was a brunet with fatal eyes.

---

Misa was provocative young female. The blonde girl with no brains, whose genitals always 'itched', and the only thing that could scratch that delicate place was the male genitals.

She was addicted to sex and stupid weekend love novels.

Raito was that kind of a man-a hero in her eyes, just like in those novels. And something was telling her that he could scratch her. It would be the best 'scratching' in the universe. Something was telling her that he was the love of her life and she had to acknowledge her presence.

So she took the eyes of Shinigami and became the second Kira.

---

**Part 3: Odd Circumstances**

Raito was desperately trying to find who the second Kira was. Of course, he was oblivious he was the first one.

He's been working in his father's team, shoulder by shoulder with L.

God knew how they could work together, when they weren't even talking to each other.

Matsuda-san was the mediator.

L had explained to Raito (lied to him) that his real name was Ryuuzaki, and the false L.

L was happy there were no lies between them now, when Raito had lost his memory.

Well, except for that one.

But still, it was kind of tragic seeing him all restless, desperately trying to find the answers. He was suspecting something and L was aware of that.

But he had found a perfect method to avoid that subject.

You would be surprised to know how simple it was, for a genius like L.

L would drag him to bed every time when Raito tried to start a conversation about 'something that had happened to him and it had been strange'.

Back to the subject. One day, his father had decided that it would have been better if Raito had had a night off.

It would have been better, not only because of the tiredness of the young man, but for the tension between the three of them.

L had agreed.

So Raito went out.

It was cold and windy, but he didn't mind. He was enjoying the sharp night air. He had time to think about things. He was secretly hoping that one day the things would turn to better for all of them.

Love was something so unexpected back then and he smiled. He loved L. The man was astonishing.

He loved extraordinary things and L was surely one of them. A part of Raito's strange collection.

---

A blonde, barely dressed young woman ran into him all of a sudden.

"That's Raito." a shinigami whispered into her ear while she was looking into the eyes of a stranger she knew. "But he doesn't know he was the first Kira, so don't mention that. Pretend."

Remu was contently smiling behind Ryuuku. 'That shinigami finally became kind of serious' she thought. 'It is good that he listens to my orders.'

Misa was staring into those beautiful dark eyes, wondering what to say.

"Excuse me…" Raito said first, helping her up, "I didn't see you…"

She smiled. She showed two wonderful rows of teeth.

"Oh…It's nothing! Besides, it was my fault." she looked at him with puppy eyes, shrugging. "Misa" she extended a hand all of a sudden.

Raito was staring at her in surprise before he collected himself and accepted the offered hand.

"Raito. "he smiled at her.

If only he knew then that she was the second Kira. What an irony, just like with him and L.

So the new friendship started, under the odd circumstances.

---

**Part 4: A Strange Friendship**

L didn't like her at all. The way she was laughing and crossing her legs clearly indicated that she was hitting on Raito.

He had never met her, but he ordered Watari to follow every Raito's step.

The state of paranoia passed when Watari saw them kissing. He didn't know how to tell L. He knew for his sensitive nature.

L lowered his head.

"Watari" he started, strangely quietly for him, "come and collect my bags. But make sure to rent a nice apartment first." he hung up straight after the word 'first'.

---

When Raito got home that night, he felt that the atmosphere was kind of strange.

Watari was sitting on the couch.

"Watari?" Raito looked at him. It all seemed so strange.

"You can come now and carry this out" Raito heard a weak voice form their bedroom.

Then a man appeared in a doorframe. The first thing Raito noticed were shoes on man's feet.

"Ryuuzaki…?"

Watari looked at the brunet before he went into the bedroom to carry out the bags.

L's eyes were sad, but he was still holding.

"What the…"

"I just don't want to be in the way of that strange _friendship_ of yours." he simply said. He wasn't that type of person to make a scene. If Raito didn't love him anymore, that was fine. He could put up with that. He really could.

Raito was just standing still, unable to comprehend.

"Besides, your father won't hate you anymore and call you a disgrace."

They had been having long talks about Raito's identity. It had been a real transformation from Pride to Traitor or Disgrace.

His true name was Cheater now.

"Ryuuzaki, how can you say something like that?" he shook his head. He found his eyes wet.

"We're ready to go." Watari said, standing in the doorframe of their home.

Not even looking at Raito, L simply left.

---

**Part 5: Forgiveness**

As a clever detective, Raito managed to find L's new phone number.

Two fingers were holding the phone, listening the heavy sigh of another.

"You told me that love would save the world one day."

'That was when I believed in love'

"So?" asked the cold voice of L, that Raito couldn't recognize anymore.

"But, do you know what love really is?" that day Raito decided to sound philosophical. It would always work with L.

L said nothing.

"It's forgiveness, Ryuuzaki."

Silence.

"Is love unfaithfulness as well?" asked L and snorted.

"Please, stop being like that…"

L shook his head and closed his eyes. It was too much. He should have never accepted the Kira case. He would have never met Raito. He would have never became more strange than he was.

Betrayal was the worst thing in the universe. It would always leave a bitter taste in your mouth and regrets.

---

**Part 6: Sex**

He should have never let him in. he should have never fall for that apologetic look in his eyes.

For now he was moaning beneath him in joy and sorrow, and Raito was crying above him, holding him, kissing him in unexplainable despair.

Too bad Watari hadn't seen that he had pushed Misa away. He had never kissed back.

But tell that to the detective. He was too paranoid.

The ex Kira was ravishing his swan-like neck, long and pale and kissable.

Then he moved down, to his shoulder and collarbone kissing it. He was penetrating deep, hitting the sweetest spot of all inside the detective.

"I'm sorry…" Raito "So, so sorry…" he sobbed.

L just pressed him tighter to himself, inhaling deeply.

Every breath was unbearable pain.

---

**Part 7: Answers**

"No, I have never kissed her." he told L that morning for a millionth time, "You paranoid detective. Why don't you put me on polygraph?"

L just smiled at him.

He decided to swallow only this time, for the sake of both of them. Wasn't the happiness the best thing in the universe?

Raito claimed his lips, running his fingers through L's spiky raven hair. He did it in a loving way that his heart was breaking.

---

"Misamisa has no purpose in this world when Raito doesn't love her. He pushed Misamisa away…" the bimbo was crying.

"I can kill him if you want" Remu said.

But Misamisa had a little brain. She sacrificed herself. And Remu fell with her.

Death was for her own good, therefore shinigami Remu, who wrote her name in the notebook, died together with her.

What is the purpose of bimbos anyway? The world has been cleansed from one unnecessary creature, and that wasn't even Raito's deed.

---

**Epilogue**

He was barefoot again. When he wears no socks, he is happy.

And when he's happy, Raito is happy as well.

But the Yagamis aren't.

---


	3. Chapter 3

**Prologue**

Love can do wonders. The scale of deeds is wide and it spreads from one extreme to another.

For instance, L was capable of giving up on the crimes of his boyfriend. He stopped investigating, closing his eyes, choosing to be blind for the truth. For one extraordinary detective, that surely would be defeat. But not for L. His new mission is to teach his lover how to love, how to save the world through love, not through murders.

Sacrifice. That was all L knew to do the best. To deprive himself from sleep in order to save lives. Now he's blind for the crime of the worst murderer in history, Kira.

L knew extremes very well.

Raito's extreme was too big love for the world. It had all started out of boredom, but ended with big desire to save the world. His love for world made him a murderer.

Raito's another extreme was his love for the man that was pursuing him.

L had stopped doing that. Raito had forgotten everything when discarded ownership of the death note.

Now love was something different for both of them.

Love was something else.

---

**Part 1: Sacrifices**

Yagami Soichiro was old-fashioned man. He couldn't comprehend the existence of homosexual people, let alone comprehend that his only son was one of them. He couldn't understand, and it was easier for him to say that he had never had son in a first place.

He was a homophobe and it was a great shock for him that his son, that once was his greatest pride, had become a 'lousy faggot'.

He never wanted him in his house again. He forbade his wife and daughter to see him, to talk to him, to be in any connection with him.

Since L had announced that Kira didn't exist anymore, it was even easier for him. He didn't even have to work with the disgrace of his son. But deep down, Yagami Soichiro knew that he was wrong. He still loved his son and he knew that love knew no limits. He chose his principles over his son. Maybe that great sacrifice was unnecessary. He was just the man afraid of unknown.

Raito knew that Soichiro would never listen; therefore he never tried to explain. That was his greatest sacrifice. In order to be with L, he had to give up on his family.

No matter how much he was trying to continue his life as if everything was normal, he caught himself saying L that he was the reason of his unhappiness.

L would never mind. He knew that Raito never meant that way. Still, the words were poisonous.

"Will you ever stop saying those things?" he asked calmly, as he usually was.

"But it's true! If it weren't for you, I would still talk to my father, my mother, and my sister. Everything would be normal."

"You were the one who started this all. You kissed me first." L was losing his patience too quickly for his taste. "You were the one who made me fall in love with you. But that's irrelevant. If you want, we can just split." L offered, trying to sound indifferent.

"I regret every moment of being with you, Ryuuzaki." Raito couldn't stop his words. He knew that it wasn't L's fault only, and that he himself was the main cause of his family disaster, but he was too proud to admit his own mistake.

Was it a mistake?

"If you feel miserable with me, then we should really split up." he placed his cup of tea on the coffee table, fished his phone out of his pocket, with only two fingers involved, and dialed a number. All of that, as if it was a routine.

"Watari? Please find me a nice penthouse as soon as possible." he said. "No, Yagami-kun won't live with me there…Yes, you may collect my luggage when you find the appropriate accommodation."

He shut the phone, looking at startled Raito. "In a few days, all of this will be over, Raito." he stood up and headed to the bedroom.

Just like that?! Only one phone call and their relationship was over?!

Surely, L wasn't the one to cry and beg and ask what was wrong. He chose Raito's happiness over his own. Raito's happiness was the only thing that mattered. L was just reasonable. He was smart enough to not be selfish.

It may looked like an easy thing-you just dial a number and Watari comes, buys you a new home, move you out, move you in…just like that. But L was sad. It wasn't easy at all, to part with the man whose soul matched his own completely. They were compatible in all possible ways. Even their heartbeats were the same. Or at least L thought so.

He admired Raito's intellectual mind, his power to deduce things properly. The possibility of Raito being wrong was about 3 percent (which translated into L's metric system meant 99 percent).

But now, all of that was gone. With one snap of the fingers. Just like that.

---

**Part 2: Apologizes Unaccepted**

When he thought of it better, all Raito could say was: "Darn, I was stupid!"

For he knew, L was all but his source of unhappiness. He refused to accept things the way they were. As always, he used his detective skills and discovered where L lived, again. Just like in that 'Misa' incident.

At the sight of his former lover, L just frowned. Even a patient man like him had to draw a line. He was fed up with Raito's mistakes.

He didn't even want to listen. They were not an ordinary couple. They didn't need to talk at all. Their hearts knew everything that should have been known.

He shook his head and was about to close the door. That story was over for him and he was ready to leave it behind that door.

Call it fate, or Raito's leg, but L's wishes never came true.

The always cheerful face was sad now, in some kind of a spasm that didn't want to let go.

"Please let me in." he whispered.

"Please remove the leg."

"No! Ryuuzaki!"

The detective shook his head. "Raito, please, don't make a scene." he said coldly.

"I'm…I'm sorry! Please…" L couldn't stand the look of those widened eyes that were pleading.

"No." said the detective. "I don't want you here, Raito-kun. I don't want to make you miserable."

"I never meant that!"

"It's your own problem." L sighed, now in severe pain. "I'll call security if you don't go immediately."

---

Yagami Soichiro opened the door. His son was soaking wet.

"We broke up. Are you happy now, old man?" Raito looked at him with half-rolled eyes.

"Raito…" Soichiro lowered his head. "I'm sorry…but how can we know that you wouldn't find the other man?"

And just like that, a reasonable man, a man of justice, Yagami Soichiro, closed the door in front of his son's nose.

"D-Dad?"

---

**Part 3: Mikami Teru**

Raito moaned out loud, melting into the warmth of somebody's heated body.

"_I found you in the rain…You were freezing."_

"_Oh?"_

The dialogue was flashing through his mind. He moaned again, feeling the other person scream in pleasure. A millisecond later, he felt the pleasuring warmth in his rectum. The person collapsed beside him, showering him with small kisses all over his face.

"_I just wanted to warm you."_

"_I can't remember a single thing."_

"_You asked me to take you. You looked so vulnerable."_

He turned his back towards the person. He felt strong arms wrapping around him protectively. He closed his wet eyes. Was he happy? Surely he was feeling so safe.

"_I just wanted to help you."_

"_It's ok. I'm all alone. I have no one in this world."_

"_I will take care of you then, if you want me to."_

"…"

"…"

"_Yeah, that would be nice, Teru-koi." _

_Koi…Already._

'I was so desperate back then…he helped me… I owe you, Teru.' he closed his eyes.

If one man of justice didn't want him, the other did.

Mikami Teru was a handsome young man, with a little longer, black hair.

"I'm just a slut, a fuck doll to you" he whispered.

"No, Raito, you aren't." Teru whispered back.

His hair was of the same color as L's…

"What am I to you?"

"My entity." Teru hugged him tighter. "The man I would fight for."

Raito shifted in his embrace. He was tired of everything.

"If you say so, Teru. But if you hurt me, I will kill you."

He heard a snoring behind his back.

---

**Epilogue**

If only people were loveless…

L was looking through the window of his new penthouse, knowing that somewhere, Raito had already found his substitution.

Love was one blind bitch.

He decided to discard it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Prologue**

If only people were heartless…

But they weren't. They never will be.

---

**Part 1: The Matter of Heart**

"I know you don't love me. But thank you anyway for the nice words…" he scratched the back of his head.

Teru lowered his head. He was sad, but he knew that Raito would never stay longer than a day or two.

"What are you up to?" he asked in as simple as he could, hoping that they could remain friends. During their short time being together, he had come to know the guy well.

Raito had stayed for a month. No sex, just long, exhausting talks.

"Dunno…I think I will just try to ask for forgiveness again…" Raito was playing with his fingers, snapping them. Not for a single second did he look in Teru's direction. He couldn't…he wasn't sure what to do, where to go…and he thought that he could find the answers in the colors of Teru's expensive carpet.

"But he rejected you the last time." objected Teru, who knew everything that had happened. He was faced with examples of homophobia many times. "Why are you trying so desperately? He still hangs up on you."

Raito sighed, thinking how childish it looked, to be sure that the answers were hiding in the carpet.

"Dunno…" he said absentmindedly. "I presume it's the matter of heart…"

---

**Part 2: Stubborn Youth**

"I've been…talking with him for so long…like a girl, confessing every detail of my pathetic love life..." he was talking to the door. They were stubbornly refusing to open.

"Please, sir, go away. Master L doesn't want to see you." said the calm, melodic voice.

"Please, Watari…" Raito cried out.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…But I can't." the voice had the admixture of sorrow.

"…" Raito remained wordless. The access to L's heart was hard to reach…

"Sir?"

"I will sit here and I all, until the mister opens the door. I want to talk to him." Raito said fiercely.

He could hear the doorsteps approaching the door. He smiled. It appeared that Ryuuzaki was anxious to see him as well.

"Please get up and don't make fool of yourself." said the familiar voice, and the click of the lock could be heard. "You stubborn brat!"

"Ryuuzaki!" Raito fell into his embrace. Oh how he needed this.

"Next time be careful what you say." L said in a serious voice. He was too sensitive for his own good.

"I will…" Raito barely whispered.

If it was meant to be, then let it be. Let people hate them. They will fight against homophobia. They will be happy in the end. They just had to believe that their goal would be accomplished…

---

**Epilogue**

Some people disagree with our lover boys. For instance, there was a danger behind the corner. And a dangerous one. Not all stories end like this one. It was wonder that L forgave in the end…

Or maybe he was just pretending?


End file.
